A promise in a kiss. ‘I have to go to work,’ I tell her. I’ve rehearsed the part where I end this sordid affair many times, but never in my mental preparation did I develop an argument for a speech like that. Another gentle, almost tickling kiss. ‘Be a little late. I don’t need much time.’ I’m aware of the faint odor of mouthwash on her breath. The swell of her breasts pushing against me. ‘I can’t,’ I put my hands on her shoulders, stepping back. Buy time, go away. Try again another day. Stupid lyrics for stupid boys. ‘It’s my first shift and I, uh, I need the money pretty badly.’ She pouts. ‘What about tomorrow, then?’ I should say no. I need to say no. But it’s not happening, so I look down at my feet for a moment. Come on, Jacob. This is easy. Tell her you can’t. Never mind the big speech, who knows what’s really going on in her life. You need to be free of it. Though you are awfully lonely. I look up and open my mouth, but I don’t really know what I’m about to say. I don’t get a. I intended to pass her off to someone else in the office. I felt it would not be right for me to handle her money.“Frank, I’m sorry, I didn’t recognize you. I wondered what happened to you. Your mother and father stopped talking to us about you when I stopped dating you.”“That’s ok Carol, just so you understand that this is not because you decided to go with someone else, but because I would not be comfortable handling your money. I will turn you over to someone else.”“Why won’t you work with me? What happened in high school was a long time ago.”“I am not comfortable working with you. Exactly why is not important. I just feel that handling money from someone I had or am having a relationship with is not right. I’m sorry. If you chose to go to a different brokerage house, I will give you some recommendations. There are also several people in this office how will do a careful and excellent management of your funds.”With that, I called my office manager and handed her off to him. After.
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